Most, if not all of us have experienced a broken heart: hurt, torn, our world imploding in on us. There are millions of books out there that talk about the grieving processes we go through and how to heal from a broken heart.
And we all have our own necessary processes of healing from a broken heart. While our necessary processes may be unique, I can say that at the heart of the processes of healing from a broken heart, forgiveness and acceptance are essential. Yes, you know that!
And I am here to remind you of the importance of, how and what you are choosing to focus on, in the forgiveness and acceptance processes.
Ask yourself, is your focus setting you up for painful or graceful healing processes?
I’ve had the nicest clients tell me they have forgiven and accepted, after experiencing a serious broken heart. But they can’t seem to find the blissful love they are ready for, or have settled for being in limbo.
Yet, when we go in deeper, we find they are harboring deep resentment; hindrances to truly moving on. Often these hindrances prevent them, not only from stepping into a blissful relationship, but also from authentically loving and adoring themselves.
If she or he broke your heart, yes, there may need to be some time to be upset and grieve. But for how long do you want to stay with these toxic emotions that are incredibly detrimental to you, on so many levels?
When you are ready to begin the forgiveness and acceptance processes, rather than simply accept that this person is no longer in your life the way you may want them to be; positively direct the focus on accepting what you loved about her or him. Know that you are getting closer to your ideal, and accept that this person was not your ideal.
When a person is your ideal, the process is easy and fun, not difficult or painful. Any pain or anguish, while in or after the relationship, is not ideal. But what you loved or what drew you to this person may have been a glimpse of an ideal, but it was not the whole yummy-licious enchilada. And you deserve a blissful heavenly love!
So focus on the glimpse(s) of what you loved, or what drew you to this person. And know that you are getting closer to a love that has gone beyond anything you could have hoped for or imagined.
Directing your focus on something positive about the person who broke your heart, and knowing that you are getting closer to your ideal, will make the forgiveness and acceptance processes much more graceful.
After coming full circle with these processes, it is highly likely that you will meet someone who loves and adores you, as much you authentically love and adore yourself. And as an added bonus you get to truly be yourself with this person.